


The Weight

by schmevil



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Grief/Mourning, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-15
Updated: 2011-10-15
Packaged: 2017-10-24 15:46:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/265204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schmevil/pseuds/schmevil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean goes for a drive. (Between seasons four and five).</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Weight

**Author's Note:**

> From last year. Just moving stuff over here.

A few months later, Dean goes for a drive.

He drives everyday. To the corner store pretty regularly, and the bigger grocery store once a week. Drops Ben off at school, and picks him up, most days. Lisa drives herself to the studio, or catches a ride with one of the other instructors. Her hours are odd. Not so odd that Dean, couldn't work around them, but she doesn't want him to, she says.

He doesn't live with them, Lisa and Ben. He isn't ready, Lisa says whenever he brings it up, and neither is she. Sometimes he feels so thankful for that, so completely relieved that he can go back to his shitty motel room, and just be. Feel whatever he's feeling that day. Self-indulgent, destructive - if he's not over at Lisa's, there's no one to care. Sometimes though, he feels guilty.

He's looking for an apartment. Just anything, so long as it's a step up from the motel room. It's harder to live in one, than to visit, and for all that he'd spent most of his life going from one to another badly decorated, strange smelling motel room, to another, there's something awful about coming back to it, night after night. He's not going anywhere - might as well put his boots up for good.

A few months later, Dean goes for a drive. A real drive. The backseat full of supplies - or his version of them - and no plan in mind, save putting some miles between him and the motel room. Lisa and Ben are off visiting her parents.

Maybe next time you'll come, she says, before kissing him goodbye. Maybe. The three of them piled into the Impala - not Lisa's sensible mom car, no way - Ben napping in the backseat, most of the way. The rest of the time screaming along to Dean's tapes. Dean has a feeling that he could charm her parents, if he tried. Maybe.

He ends up in the middle of nowhere. Not really nowhere - probably some farmer's or eccentric's bit of nothing land - but nowhere enough for him to park the car, and get out. The sun set miles ago, and it's deep into that boring stretch of night that's just cloudy dark and few noises. He shimmies onto the hood, beer in hand, and lays back against the windshield, waiting for the sky to clear.

He drinks, and one by one the stars come out, until he's looking into a blanket of them, tiny and bright, and exactly as they were the last time he'd done this with Sam.


End file.
